ClydeStyle

Tag: Accountability

  • The art of making sense

    We seem to have a problem in our country with making sense, and it has nothing to do, per se, with not knowing. It I wrapped in the choices we make.

    You have to actually work harder to not make sense. Making sense entails processing truth in a way that demonstrates you understand it. Then, you can actualize with it or apply that truth to life. There are several things that hinder this process. Jealousy, envy, bias, hatred, prejudice, misunderstanding, revenge, and strife are some of the catalysts that prevent us from making sense.

    In recent years, we have struggled to make sense of the “me too” movement. Although it was horrible how women have been treated in our country and how they have been used as sex symbols, in pornography and in other ways to pleasure men, we took no responsibility for that. In a time when many women gave in and used sex to get what they wanted, men could not tell them a part from their counterparts who had were not will to play. Then, men decided that it was just easier to drug the woman and get what you wanted from her.

    It said that in this country, women were still treated like chattel, and many allowed themselves to be. It’s as if women liberation hadn’t existed. Women’s lib made the same mistake the Civil Rights Movement did, and the Gay Rights Movement is making. All three should have not been asking for equality, but a seat at the table. They needed to get on the ground floor of decision-making so that their interest could be guaranteed. All they did was trust that their oppressors would start “acting right” because of the movements — senseless.

    So all three groups are still fighting for the promise of equality they are already supposed to have. Had they gotten a seat at the table – meaning then needed representation in government. And they would have to be placed there because a biased country wouldn’t vote them there. We may have even had to expand Congress to 535 members, but those spots could have been reserved for these interests groups. Clearly, it makes know sense to trust your oppressor with fairness. If that were in them, they would have stopped on their own.

    Trust needs to make sense. Do you trust a rabid dog? Do you trust a fox not bother any eggs while he’s hanging out in the hen house? Would you let a pedophile watch you kids? Would you let a stranger hold your purse or wallet?

    Can you see and understand the truth when it comes your way? Water is always wet. Boulders will always be heavy. Fresh coffee is hot. Humans are flawed. Greed greatly hinders many good things in America from happening.

    Am I making sense?

  • Judges Thomas and Alito are just the tip of the iceberg

    Life constantly proves that we are flawed. As a part of our moral development, we should seek to excel in integrity, goodness, truth, and character, but we have lost our way.

    If we can no longer expect our Supreme Court justices to be honest, how can we expect it in other courts? It seems that there is always a problem when people don’t speak out against injustice. We made that a habit in our country, and it still hinders us today.

    The only thing needed to start a revolution after slavery ended would have been for whites to stand up and acknowledge wrongdoing. If some would have just called it as they saw it because never is it ok to make people property.

    During the Civil Rights movement, our legislative, judicial, and executive branches had a golden opportunity to move our country light years ahead by simply speaking up for what is right! Today, there are horrible police practices that many police, if they were not guilty themselves, could denounce as evil, but they stand silent. Some of the districts that our children are supposed to be educated in are failing. Some of that failure is “teacher failure,” but no one is saying that. Prison conditions in America are deplorable, and very little is being done to change it. Veterans still don’t have all of their promised benefits, but again, we are quiet.

    It’s hard to name an area of interest that isn’t corrupt. Pastors in churches are taking advantage, and some are even getting paid to sell a bad version of hope. And even in the presidency — from Trump to Biden — there are major struggles with integrity and truthfulness.

    Sadly, it seems that we declared independence from the wrong things. Where we should have set ourselves free from lies, laziness, selfishness, and bigotry, we embraced these and would go on to forsake fairness, honor, moral virtue, and serving others. Our freedoms are not for the better but the worse in America. We are free to dishonor our constitution and look out for number one — self!

    There are more justices guilty. We will see more police brutality, bad teachers, and corrupt politicians. And unless there is accountability being enforced, America will implode from within. We won’t have to worry about foreign enemies destroying us. We’re killing ourselves.

  • Holmes in prison is poetic justice

    Elizabeth Holmes, the perfect unicorn

    Theranos founder Elizabeth Holmes was either brilliant or crazy when she quickly built her start-up company on a lie, raised billions, and now owes more than 450 million in damages and is serving 11 years.

    Her vivid imagination fooled thousands, and she went further than she should have. Why? Because of two things: White Privilege and greed.

    Nothing about her story was impressive. In fact, her claims were so outrageous that if you could imagine any other race saying the same thing to the same investors, you would quickly see how unextraordinary they were.

    College dropout. Discovered what? What about this quitter would have made wealthy investors not vet her and trust that she must be on the cutting edge of something that would revolutionize an industry? She had absolutely zero knowledge of this field and no skill. What an insult to the egg heads currently spending years trying to do the same thing.

    She was the unicorn every greedy, wealthy person dreams about. Ground-floor level of new technology. And her whiteness made her believable!

    The bottom line is that on paper, she was a complete fraud who had done absolutely nothing to get the trust given to her, except she was the right color. Greed was also a contributing factor and works as a blinder – the men she hustled were fools, and the old saying is true: A fool and his money are soon parted.

  • Keep your empathy; give compassion!

    I believe the single greatest thing we need in our country is compassion. We all go through things, and we tend to forget when we see someone else going through things that we’ve been there or have had similar problems.

    If we were more compassionate, we would see laws and policies that would help individuals recover from mistakes instead of just allowing us to waddle in them. What if we did have a country that was set up for everyone to succeed?

    Currently, we have political parties who either want to forget the past as if it didn’t greatly affect our present day and another group that wants to keep those struggling handicapped by offering them a little something for their troubles but not enough to solve anything.

    Compassion has two parts to it. The first is to have a sympathetic consciousness of others’ distress. Then, allow that to motivate your desire to alleviate it. Empathy stops at the first part.

    It is a sad commentary when we have to plead to the world for compassion, but that is the case. We have some people who are really on hard times – some are dealing with self-inflicted wounds, and others were victims of circumstance. To change this, it has to be done individually because the collective republic doesn’t give a damn. So, what can we do to show compassion?

    1) Be a resource to the people around you. People don’t know what they don’t know.

    2) Decide on a certain amount of money you will give away each week and don’t exceed it, but give liberally with it.

    3) Make sure that the people who are closest to you are doing well to the best of your ability. Make sure you are doing well first, then them.

    4) Use your influence to gather partners with you in this crusade. A group of successful people can really make a difference in a community.

    5) Commit to being the voice and an ally for the less fortunate, especially when dealing with the powers that be.

  • Have gun, will travel

    This phrase from the 50s is all about being ready to do anything. There was even a show about it back then, but the makers of this show would have never imagined that their callous attitude about the use of guns would be trumped by the views held currently about gun use.

    I wonder how many folks believe the founding fathers were thinking of automatic weapons when they wrote in the constitution for us to have the right to bear arms?

    What is more scary is that in recent months, there have been some really senseless shootings. There have been people shot for going to the wrong house, getting in the wrong car, standing around doing nothing, and going to a sweet 16 party. It seems as though the school shootings, church shootings, and other mass shootings are old news.

    Have we gotten bored with shootings?

    And then, Congress can’t seem to find the courage to solve this very simple problem. The answer is not as easy as changing gun laws or even outlawing certain guns because there are too many guns available.

    If we take the position that we all have to die of something or you feel that as long as it is not your kid getting shot, then who cares? It is easy to see how votes can be purchased for a price, and the NRA has deep pockets. Their average spending is around 3.2 million per year, buying the votes of senators and other law makers.

    The level of hypocrisy has to stop. Clearly, the answer will not come on a federal level. It has to take place state by state. Local organizing is the answer, and the time to do it is now. Have political power, will travel!

  • What to do when love calls? (part 3 of 3)

    The doorbell rings and there is a gentleman caller. He’s well groomed and standing there with a single rose. He greets me with a hug and he smells amazing. The aroma is earthy with a hint of citrus. He’s excited to get where we’re going and he says I will love the surprise. We head out to his car and he opens the door and assists her in getting in. He starts the car and beautiful jazz sounds come from the bose speakers. We’re off and I don’t care what happens next.

    This scenario is a beautiful to a potentially satisfying evening. Two people who are available, drama free and emotionally available to each other. They are both at the stage of life, where they are looking for a partner to share life successes. All the kids are adults and doing well, houses are owned, advancement at work are abundant, and they’re both in the mood for love.

    It is surprising how uncommon this situation is. Typically, one or both partners have a deficiency in life that tends to hinder healthy relationships. If this scenario is closer to your situation, then you are considered blessed. However, there are 5 things that have to be present to assure success in the relationship.

    First, there is honesty. This is a key ingredient to every healthy relationship because you can’t build trust without it. Honesty is being truthful and sincere with your words, actions, and thoughts. What reason would there be for someone to be dishonest in a relationship? There is no reason to be dishonest, and a healthy relationship has no tolerance for dishonesty.

    Second, integrity is acting in a way you know to be right and kind in all situations. This should be a quality that everyone brings to the table, but those who lack the ability to have a healthy relationship see nothing wrong with omitting integrity. This should be another deal breaker.

    Third, respect is treating people, places, and things with kindness. A person who normally lacks in this area starts with not respecting themselves. A good test is to see how this person speaks about their parents. For a female, it’s her dad, and with the son, it’s the mom. These are the people who would be the instructors for your partner, and if they didn’t learn it from them, then they probably don’t know it.

    Fourth is attentive, which means a person who pays close attention to the welfare and well-being of another. This is the quality where a person makes you feel like you really matter. They pay attention when things are not right. They calculate strategies to make you happy. They know how to give their undivided attention and live directly in the moment.

    Last but not least, the person needs to be open minded and have a sense to at least try something once. This brings a freshness to the relationship and the opportunity to explore together and learn what works best for each partner. The world is a big place with lots of customs and rituals that become great learning tools for an adventurous couple.

    These ingredients serve as great starting points for a healthy relationship. So remember to not rush into anything. Relationships should always be a choice.

  • What to do when love calls (part 2 of 3)

    The only thing better than an old relationship is a new relationship, and spring is the time to get it on! (Cue the music)

    We made it through the big holidays, and New Year’s Day is an after thought. Valentine’s Day caught us in our feelings, and we knew it was time for a new love. But the person we met shows a bit of hesitation. They are not as responsive as they were when we first met. Calls are not being returned at the frequency we would like, and it seems that they could go a whole 48 hours without talking.

    Our egos caution us to tread lightly, but we don’t listen. We start to assume that there may be so.e mental health challenges with this person after all, how could they not jump on this relationship opportunity?

    At this point, we really should back off and allow the relationship to advance itself organically. That means that if it is supposed to happen, it will without any coaching for either party. We have to leave room for there to be a problem that actually has nothing to do with us.

    Everybody has a past. Good, bad, and ugly. There are things that have happened in previous relationships that we need to heal from and get over. Imagine meeting someone whose previous relationship was with a controlling narcissist. They will have been bullied, controlled, lied on, made to feel unimportant and gaslighted.

    As a result, anything you attempt to do by way of being overbearing will be a trigger. They will be very sensitive to this feeling and will retreat at the first sign. Also, God made us all unique, so what worked in the previous relationship won’t necessarily work in the new one. Another mistake is to try and be intimate with someone too song. This can be a direct turnoff, especially if sex was an issue in the previous relationship.

    The best advice for starting a new relationship is to allow the natural development of the new relationship. That means that the nature of the relationship will dictate its type. You may want it to turn into your next spouse, and all the person is looking for is a friend. You may desire a friend with benefits, but the person wants a soul mate. We need to be diligent and kind to each other. We cannot control how another person feels — to do such is juvenile.

  • Is the resurrection still relevant?

    Every year, Christians around the world will celebrate everything associated with Easter. Many will go to church, kill the fattest calf, and lay out an Easter dinner fit for a king – all in memory of the King of kings and Lord of lords.

    Although it is not a holy holiday (none of them are), the tradition of Easter has been blended with Spring traditions, and this is where the Association of Easter eggs comes from. It is said to have been started in Germany where the symbol of eggs carry the thought of new life which happens in the Spring.

    Biblically, the death, burial and resurrection of Jesus Christ is the focal point. But the question today is how relevant is the resurrection?

    Does it matter that Christ died for the sins of the world? How is that shown to matter in your life? What of all the power that accompanied his resurrection which we have access to today — does that matter.

    What of the idea that eternal life is now available to all who believe and are obedient to his calling? To be called a Christian society, we do a horrible job of showing the power of the resurrection in our lives. There are just too many things we don’t care about! Some could care less about abortions. Others care less about school or mass shootings. Still, others never say anything about police brutality or the killing of unarmed back men.

    We don’t care about those with views different from ours. It’s a big “so what” that there are people falsely imprisoned. And of course, not many seem to be too concerned with homelessness, veterans’ rights, and those struggling with mental health issues.

    If the resurrection matters, then we need to use it to resurrect a few of the societal problems we face and solve them for those who suffer. Christ suffered on a cross so we wouldn’t have to. We need to return the favor to those less fortunate.

  • The power of our integrity

    The division we face in this world is directly related to our integrity. Let me explain. Integrity is the state of being whole and undivided. Our divisions come from a response to what is happening and the blaming of opposing sides.

    For example, Republicans are convinced that President Joe Biden is bad for America. A growing population believes the Republicans are holding back our country. Depending on what side you fall on, you will pick up the disagreements where they left off. You will be outraged because they are. You will play out their thoughts with your aggression as we saw at the insurrection on Jan. 6.

    Integrity is the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles. It’s moral uprightness. You see, this allows me to maintain my moral integrity even when my favorite party goes rogue.

    Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris ran on a platform that promised to improve our criminal justice system. Now they could still do something but the fact that it’s not even being discussed is disappointing. Further, under this administration, we are doing more for Ukrainian refugees than we are for American citizens who are struggling. Congress recently passed legislation that allows Ukrainian refugees to collect social security benefits — to the tune of more than two grand per person in the household.

    Social security is a system that the beneficiaries have paid into over time. This would mean that our hard-earned dollars are going to help them and not the folks that it was intended. And neither party has solved the problem of making sure all eligible veterans receive their benefits. There are too many who are homeless.

    Integrity is the element that should stop a person from grabbing a firearm and harming innocent folks! If you cannot look at the various arguments without losing your cool, you have an Integrity problem.

    What Dr. Martin Luther King was trying to do with the civil rights movement was take people with integrity to look at society’s problems systemically and find nonviolent ways to solve such problems. He was quite successful in doing that.

    Today America needs an integrity check and begin to solve its problems in the best interest of all people. If not, we will destroy ourselves from the inside.

  • These three words: I got you!

    In these troubled times in which we live, there are three words other than I love you that bring healing to the soul, warmth to the heart, and comfort to the mind and that is the words: I got you!

    It’s so simple, yet very meaningful and like the phrase “I love you”, “I got you” has to be used only when you mean it! We are not talking just good intentions here folks. I got you should always be spoken with great confidence and an assurance by the user that heaven and earth will pass away but these words will linger.

    All good dads have this phrase locked and loaded for their families. There is nothing like the securer of the house giving the smackdown on trouble by letting the offspring know this phrase is for them.

    The love of a good mother begins with this phrase. Moms are known for making the impossible happen and coming through in a pinch! Even in the animal kingdom, the female of the species wears the phrase like a budget. Just try to take a lion cub from his mom.

    You can learn a lot about the character of a person by how careful they are with this phrase. This world needs many more people who can open up a can of “I got you” and produce a meal that heals.

    Honor the people in your life who live by this phase and if you find your present company lacking, just know that you deserve better!