ClydeStyle

Category: Accountability

  • Truth or consequences?

    Jesus, on one occasion, said to let your yea be yea and your nay be nay.

    He wanted us to honor our words. If you say you are going to do something, make sure you do it. Keep your promises. Don’t say things that you do not mean. All of these things speak to the character of the one saying them.

    Our society has a hard time keeping its word. From government and politicians to the pulpits and preachers and everyone in between, we struggle to keep our word.

    It has been so bad that once we are found not keeping our word, the response is so callous and matter-of-factly stated, “oh well.” ” It happens.” “Get over it!”

    Wives are not keeping promises to manage the home; husbands and fathers are not taking care of their families; whole school systems have failed to keep their promises to educate; and the governments deceive.

    What judgment are we to face because of this? One of the seven things God hates is a lying tongue. We need not to make this too complicated. Imagine a world where everyone kept their word? Imagine a world where honesty is the most important thing and not profit?

    Don’t get caught living in lies! For we must realize that we are not merely lying to men, but to God and his judgment is coming.

    Let’s make 2012 a better year by presenting ourselves open and honest before God and mankind.

  • The importance of types in scripture

    A few weeks ago, I began teaching a class on types in scripture.  By types I mean that an Old Testament story is somewhat of a mirror to a scenario today. We often don’t associate or connect the Old Testament and the New Testament together this way, but we really should. There is much to be learned by “things written aforetime” (Rom. 15:4).

    There are several types portrayed in scripture between the time of Adam and the Law of Moses. I would like to expound on five. First, God’s action toward Adam and Eve in the garden as he made provisions for his people and gave them purpose.  This is something he does for us in Christ today. Christ was our provision and we have a purpose in our life that centers on doing his will. Second, even when God put Adam and Eve out of the garden, he taught them a lesson on the consequences of sin. Because of their sin, something died. Physically, God shed blood from animals to cover their sin. This practice would continue until Christ died on the cross. Many bulls and goats died because of the sins of God’s people. And all that blood could do is what it did on Adam and Eve’s exodus from the garden – cover their sins.

    Third, Cain and Abel is one of the oldest lessons in the bible as it relates to man. Abel’s offering was based on God’s revelation; Cain’s offering was based on man’s imagination. This lesson is played out every Sunday as so-called religious people attempt to worship the Father “their” way and not God’s way. Many are responding to the gospel by man’s imagination instead of God’s revelation. This is a powerful lesson that man must learn before Jesus returns.

    Forth, Enoch, the bible says, was translated so that he didn’t see death and it was all because of his faith. Our faith works exactly the same way in that Col. 3:13 tells us that we are translated into the kingdom of his dear son because of our faith. Enoch’s testimony will always serve as a wonderful type for us today in that it was said of him before his translation, that he pleased God. We then learn, in  Heb. 11:6, that without faith it’s impossible to please God. Enoch was a man of faith and because of his faith he was translated. And today because of our faith so are we.

    Fifth, we have to say a bit about Noah. There are so many types when we discuss Noah. My favorite is the comparison of the Ark to the Church. Both places work much like the inn in the story of the Good Samaritan. The inn was the place where Christ would keep his souls saved until his return. The ark served that purpose and the Church today does as well. Do you see any other types in the bible during the time spanned between Adam and the law Moses gave?

  • Your love of tennis means nothing

    It seems in these trying times we live in that it is getting more difficult to navigate our relationships. One would think that we all needed therapy as sometimes it seems that we can’t do anything right.

    Either we are not working together or we’re going in two different directions. Or we are being to critical or not critical enough. We are too self-fish, too demanding, too righteous, too lazy … well you get the picture. I want to share a concept with you that may shine some light on how we are supposed to get along and how we can gravitate toward the positive and benefit both parties — and we do this with tennis.

    Now I’m not asking you to go play or watch tennis. What I want to do is borrow a few concepts to make a point.Imagine your troubled relationship as a doubles team in tennis. To play doubles in tennis you have to know a little bit about the strengths and weaknesses of your partner. Not only do you have to know them, but you have to use their strengths and protect their weakness. Did you catch that? I said you must use their strengths and protect their weaknesses.

    Some tennis players are slow moving to their weak side. Others might have a strong right hand, but a horrible back hand. When you learn these weaknesses and strengths you are able to set up your partner in a way that they are going to look like a pro. So if my partner is not as strong going to her left, guess who will play on her left side? You got it. Now, if I don’t play on her left side once I figure out that this is a weakness for her, shame on me!

    If my partner has a strong right hand, then my job when I serve is to place the ball so that when it returns, it comes to her right side. Of course, it’s impossible to make this happen every single time, but you can manipulate that serve enough that it happens more than enough to win.

    Why would I want to do that you ask? Well if I view my partner as truly being my partner, I have her best interest in mind. If you are not sure of this, you need to have a heart-to-heart with your partner and see if she or he feels that you hold their best interest. What a wonderful opportunity life provides if the significant other feels that you don’t have their best interest. Take this challenge and honor your mate by letting him or her know that you admire their strengths and you promise to protect their weaknesses. Humility will make them say it back to you. Where as love means absolutely nothing in tennis, it means everything in true relationships.

    Tennis anyone?

  • Part 2: Is my heart right with God?

    Adam and Eve continued their family problems as the fourth chapter of Genesis introduced us to the oldest lesson in the Bible. The account of Cain and Abel shows perfectly the joys of serving God and the consequences of disobedience. This account tells us how to be pleasing to God and how to disappoint God. It tells us what good God can produce in us through His revelation and what bad things can be conjured through our imagination.

    In Heb. 11:4, the Bible tells us that it was Abel who offered a more excellent sacrifice than Cain did and it was from that sacrifice that he obtained witness that he was righteous. One of the joys of being a child of God and having the opportunity to serve Him with gladness is the fact that we can know assuredly that we are righteous.

    In Jer. 23:1-8 we understand that in the rebuke of the pastors of Judah and Israel, the prophet explains that our righteousness is in the Lord and that being true, everyone who is “in the Lord” has obtained righteousness through Him. Abel’s witness, therefore, is in God reaching down from heaven and consuming his offering (I Chr. 21: 26 and 2 Chr. 7:1) and likewise with us as Paul said, “…like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.”

    Jude well documents the perils of traveling “the way of Cain.” Cain had his own ideas about how God should be to him. Cain obviously took God’s word as a suggestion instead of heeding the Master’s voice. Even in the text where God gave him an opportunity to turn from his ways (Gen. 4:5-7) he chose instead to go his own way and kill his brother – which led to Cain being banished from the presence of God. This must be the wickedest of states to be in. Who would want to be alienated from God?

    But, dear reader, isn’t there a little “Cain” in us all? Why is it that we knowingly do things? Sometimes we even plan to do things wrong. God’s word tells us to have self control, yet when someone crosses us we let them have it. If we don’t lay hands on them, we definitely have a few choice words for them. God’s word requires us to love one another, but for some reason we always want to love the people who are easy to love. As for the challenging folks – they don’t stand a chance. And some of us believe that it’s ok to not show love to the people who make life difficult for us. It’s hard! We remember that it’s God we want to serve, it’s just that we remember that too late. And so quickly things are said or done that we wish we could take back.

    Thank God that there is hope for us. We live in this flesh and until we are changed at Judgment Day to put on incorruption, we will sin. God knew this so He sent Jesus to take our punishment. As a result, we now have the forgiveness of sins, a promised inheritance and God’s Spirit with us. What God is expecting from us is that we walk by faith. We’re not called to be perfect, but we are called to be faithful. Catch the difference: Faith requires us to hear, believe, trust and obey. We hear God’s word. We believe that his word is true. We trust that the things said in his word will come to pass and then we obey what it says. This does not make us perfect –  it makes us pleasing to God.

    To answer the question is our heart’s right with God, we must first establish who we hear, who we believe, who we trust and who we obey. If I still think that I have value (in and of myself) and have taken credit for my good fortune, then I should hear myself. If I believe that God is far greater than I am and His thoughts are not my thoughts and His ways are far above my ways, then I should hear Him. The choice is really simple. It’s the consistency that’s going to kill us.

    Be encouraged my friends that despite the odds and everything that we see, God is in control and can definitely be trusted. Make peace with the Almighty and live faithful unto Him. For the 117th division of Psalm states: “O praise the LORD, all ye nations: praise Him, all ye people. For His merciful kindness is great toward us: and the truth of the LORD endures forever. Praise ye the LORD.”

  • Part 1: Is my heart right with God?

    We have many examples biblically and in our daily lives of the challenges and triumphs of serving God. Sometimes we have to sit back and be honest about the answer to this question: Do we really want to serve God? This is one of those questions that we should be honest with because God already knows the answer. Without embarrassing myself or any of the folks I counsel, let’s review how hard it can be through the eyes of the first family.

    God gave Adam and Eve dominion over everything that He created on earth and entrusted them as keepers of the Garden of Eden. Adam was clearly given instructions on how to serve God and what God’s expectation was within their covenant. There is sufficient evidence that Adam instructed Eve regarding service to God, as her conversation with the serpent reveals instructions regarding the forbidden fruit – her mate would have been the only person to tell her. (Gen. 3:1-5).

    The Bible does not reveal to us exactly how long Adam and God shared this covenant relationship before Eve was created, but arguably Adam definitely knew the benefits of this union and enjoyed the splendor of serving God and being obedient to His word.

    Unfortunately, Eve was deceived and Adam turned from leader to follower and the two were alienated from God and sin separated them. The covenant had been broken and the relationship drastically changed. In this state, it would have been better for Adam to have never known the covenant relationship with God rather than experience it and lose everything. Said Peter in 2 Pet. 2:21: “For it had been better for them not to have known the way of righteousness, than, after they have known it, to turn from the holy commandment delivered unto them.”

    We have the same opportunity Adam and Eve had to glorify God. We receive arguably better things than they did, considering the fact that the world is a bit more advanced than in their day.

    Nevertheless, as they struggled to maintain a relationship that is pleasing to God, we do, too. And we don’t do it for the same reason they didn’t – we lust from our eyes, we lust in our flesh and we’re full of pride. Satan knows these things so he attacks us through one or all of these three.

    If you read the conversation between the serpent and Eve you will see these three things in play:

    • Eve saw that the fruit was good (lust of the eye)
    • Eve saw that the fruit held the key to wisdom that could make her like God (pride of life)
    • Eve’s answer to the question of why they were at that tree in the first place (lust of the flesh)

    Adam and Eve could eat from any tree save this one. It was in the midst of the garden. Wouldn’t you think that it would be easy to avoid? Why couldn’t they stay on the outer banks and never go into the midst of the garden to be tempted regarding the tree?

    The challenges we face in the flesh lead us to second guess what we know to be right or wrong. It is literally how we are drawn away.

    Can this process be avoided?

    Next week we’ll examine Cain and Abel and draw some meaningful conclusions about them and the lesson that comes from their story.

  • Who’s your daddy?

    A young lady, after seeing the country embrace Mother’s Day, thought to establish Father’s Day. This young woman’s father was a Civil War veteran and had to raise a newborn with five of his other children following the death of his wife at the newborn’s birth. This woman recalls the love and tender care her father had for their family and that fact that he raised them on his own.

    Her campaign led to the 1966 proclamation by then President Lyndon B. Johnson declaring Father’s Day to be the third Sunday in June.

    It seems that the role of the father was short-lived in the home as the liberation of women, equal opportunity for women and minorities and the media all contributed to the destruction of the father.

    Now this is not to say that there are not any great fathers today – there are tons. There are still men who care and love their families and have contributed greatly to the success of their children and their mental stability.

    What I am saying is that the number of truly great dad’s pale in comparison to the number that are bad, don’t care, are not trying or think they have done enough.

    America began to abandon its puritanical concept at the beginning of women’s liberation. Women needed to be liberated from the stereotypical roles forced on them by society. Along with these rules, women were trapped in these roles because our laws at the time did not protect them or provide a way for them to earn a decent living.

    Moreover, there were no guarantees to force the men to care for their children if they left.

    Today, new laws have given women the chance to earn just as much money as a man. She is now free to open her own door, die in wars, hear all the dirty jokes they want and stand up on crowded buses and subways without a man giving up his seat.

    And now the men are just free.

    When the women did the work that was stereotypically given to men, men did not, in turn, begin doing their work. This led to women having to work 40 hours or more per week and then come home and cook, clean and look after the kids. There still isn’t a rule that says a man even has to help, although it would be nice.

    Following liberation and new laws, the media helped to ensure that the role of the father would never be the same.

    The father went from being the steady, solid rock in the home that gave stability to the family and reinforced their core values, to being the buffoon and tail-end of all the jokes. If you are an avid TV watcher or at least enjoy watching TV land and Nick-at-Nite on cable, you will recall strong fathers like Ward Cleaver, Andy Griffith and Howard Cunningham. These fathers were traded in for weaker fathers such as Fred Flintstone, Fred Sanford and Archie Bunker.

    Then it got even worse as Peter Griffin (Family Guy), Homer Simpson and Cleveland Brown (the Cleveland show) began to dominate the sitcoms. These TV fathers helped shape expectations of fathers in the home. They have contributed to the destruction of the family and made dad nothing but a joke.

    We truly need a day to celebrate dads. I hope that it would be a day that males could be educated on what it takes to be a “real” dad. We need to remember when fathers chose to make sure their families knew they were loved, safe and secure. A time when fathers made sure their families never had to worry about them not coming home. We need to be reminded of a time when the fathers were the real heroes in their families and not some cartoon or some other fictitious character, but imitators in all aspects of our Father in heaven.

  • What type of person are you?

    As an employer, I’ve reviewed lots of resumes. Some made me laugh, some made me cry and some actually made me angry.

    Let me explain.

    An example of a resume that makes me laugh is one that I know is full of fluff. You know the type: The housewife who calls herself a domestic engineer or the receptionist who calls herself a communication specialist. Resumes that make me cry are the ones where you know the person didn’t use “spell check” and you see that the person is trying real hard, but too many errors spell trouble. Resumes that make me angry are the ones which are just an outright lie. This is beyond fluff. This is the idiot who thinks that you won’t contact the previous employers so they say they did things in the job responsibilities that don’t match the pay grade. The point of all of this is how we see ourselves.

    Some people are the type that can “make it happen!” There are others who just simply “watch it happen!” and still others who wonder “what happen?” Of these three, which are you?

    Are you the person who is working a dead end job with no room for advancement? Not only that, but if there was room for advancement, you don’t have any skills to advance. Does your resume look like a smorgasbord of jobs that don’t connect? There is nothing wrong with being this way if it’s working for you. If it’s not, it’s probably because you are the person who wonders “what happen?”

    The scariest part of the economy collapse is the idea of old jobs vanishing and a person not being able to compete in the new job market. I remember in the ‘90s when the Willow Run plant closed in Ypsilanti, Mich., and many of the people there were out of work and could not find any jobs which paid the same as the plant. These were good folks who spent the last 18 – 20 years of their lives taking care of their families and putting their kids through school. They paid their bills on time and enjoyed a nice middle class income. Once the plant closed there was nothing. These folks had a high school education and with overtime made upwards of 70K. The only jobs available for them in the small town of Ypsilanti paid from six to eight dollars per hour.  They were then stuck wondering what happen.

    Those that “watch it happen” tend to be lazy. These are your run-of-the-mill, satisfied where I am, don’t want to break a sweat type people who are still looking for a short cut to success. These people clearly have the ability to be better, but won’t. Why you ask? Any number of reasons: scared of failure, scared of success, low self-worth, arrogant or lazy. I remember when I used to manage market research companies and I had an employee who had the right stuff to become a supervisor. This woman was a single parent and a very hard worker. The increase would have been an extra $7,680 per year for her. She said she didn’t want the extra responsibility. Go figure.

    Then, of course, there is the category that everyone thinks they are in. We live in a society where not everyone can “make it happen”. There are many failures at the bottom of this group as those “watching” made an attempt or two to crossover this threshold. Balance is the key to success here. Anyone who has reached the right level of balance in their life has mastered this task of “making it happen.”

    What I mean by balance is fulfilling the right amount of quality with quantity. The right amount of drive with humility; skill with education and patience with love – this category houses all of your visionaries. This group did not need motivation – it was built from within. They didn’t need to be reinforced, complimented or validated. These folks are not conceited; they’re as good as they say they are.

    So I ask again, which one are you? And if you’re not satisfied with the outcome, change.

  • The Man in the Mirror

    Have you ever looked in the mirror and forget what you looked like? Seems strange, doesn’t it?

    I mean we see ourselves all the time and you would think there would be something wrong with a person who can’t remember what they look like, especially after just looking in the mirror.

    Well, the Bible tells of this condition where a person beholds himself in a mirror and immediately forgets what manner of man he is (James 1:23, 24). The Bible is comparing this mirror-looker to a person who hears God’s word and forgets about it.

    It’s interesting how God would make the spoken word so powerful. Someone who you give your trust to could give you a compliment and literally change a bad day into a good one. Unfortunately, the fence swings both ways so that a negative comment would have the converse effect.

    God never wanted us to be forgetful hearers.

    The truth is that we are. His Word was designed to spiritually turn us into the image of His son – if we would remember the things we heard from His Word.

    The Bible is full of folks who were forgetful hearers. Remember Cain and Abel? It was by faith that Abel offered a better sacrifice. It was because Cain was a forgetful hearer that God wouldn’t accept his offering. Two sons who grew up in the same household, with the same parents only to respond differently to what they heard is shocking, but not uncommon.

    Remember Jacob and Esau? That birthright really didn’t mean much to Esau who clearly lived his life in the moment. Jacob, on the other hand, paid close attention to such things and well, you know what happened: Jacob got the blessing and the birthright.

    Abraham and Lot also come to mind. I’m particularly thinking about when Abraham wanted to keep peace between Lot’s men and his own so he sought out territory for them to split in order to keep peace. He let Lot pick which area he would live and he chose Sodom and Gomorrah. That’s like choosing Las Vegas, NV over St. George, Utah. Nevertheless, Lot’s choice tore up his home and eventually ruined his life. Why did Lot choose Sodom? Was he just trying to make a fast buck or did he just forget what he heard?

    How many other people do you know who must have forgotten what they heard? You think Tiger Woods forgot? How about Lawrence Taylor? Or what about Jesse James (Sandra Bullock’s Ex), Chris Brown, George Bush, Allen Iverson or Congressmen Joe Wilson, do you think they forgot?

    Let’s get even more personal. What about me and you? It’s seems as though we are running out of excuses. We need to be the change we want to see, as Gandhi said. That will not happen until we began to take a long look at the man or woman in the mirror or as the Bible says spend a long time studying God’s Word. Until then, we just have no right to point fingers and complain. We need to get busy.

  • The Crime of Cheating!

    So it seems that in America we have a conscience. Albeit a conditional conscience, but nevertheless a conscience.

    Tiger Woods and many other super athletes, famous actors, rich folks and presidents have all been caught cheating on their spouses. The only difference between 70 years ago and now is that today we act like we really care. When we look at the fall of marriage in America, our attempt to keep it sacred is to crucify the ones who get caught violating the bonds of marriage as a reminder for us all. It’s sort of like in medieval times when they would have public executions.

    Well, Tiger Woods was the latest victim. Sad to say for me I won’t see him and golf the same anymore. The reason is not what you think. I DO NOT condone cheating on your spouse, but it happens. I don’t condone lying either, but guess what? It happens. However, here we have this rich guy, who has made this woman rich beyond her wildest imagination. He’s a very powerful man who does many charitable things – including a state of the art school for inner city kids to provide them with a first-class education. One reporter made the comment that he shouldn’t have the school anymore because he’s not a good role model. Seriously?!?

    The man plays golf very well — better than anyone else on the planet. Let’s say that he is a role model. Wouldn’t that role model status be limited to just golf? Or are we really to believe that because he’s an awesome golfer that he has to live up to the standards of moral excellence as well? Is there some secret code that says a man who excels in anything, must be as good in everything else?

    Tiger shouldn’t have cheated. He probably shouldn’t have gotten married in the first place, but for this adult to be reduced to this scrutiny about his personal life is not fair. The crime for this cheat isn’t the cheating – it’s the self righteous views of the public. Cheating doesn’t mean Tiger is now a bad golfer, a bad father or even a bad husband. It just means he cheated and it was a bad decision.

    It’s not even our business. Some argue that this is the price for fame. It’s not. He is a victim of circumstance. Seventy years ago, this wouldn’t have made the news. Ty Cobb, Babe Ruth and many other athletes, rich folks, presidents and famous actors cheated. Men particularly would cheat because they could without much of a penalty back then. There were not even laws to take care of the victims back then. So guess what the victims did? They stayed. They made adjustments and they remained married. It was what men did and women were expected to take it and be thankful for what they had. (Rent the movie Mona Lisa Smile for more info on this).

    Again, I am not condoning cheating. What I’m saying is that if this is the standard we are going to maintain, then we should do it for everyone. Not just the rich and famous, but everyone. But we can’t stop there. What about the victims in these cases? When is there a judgment against them? Maybe Tiger’s wife when she got angry with him, she withheld sex. Maybe Tiger likes to do really kinky things that she doesn’t want to do. Maybe she’s not as clean as Tiger would like her to be and it’s a turnoff for him. Or maybe she’s just a spoiled little daddy’s girl whose attitude of entitlement has pushed Tiger away. Or maybe she has done nothing to deserve this. In all of these cases, they don’t need public commentary, they need private counseling.

    I hope my point is clear. If not I’ll spell it out one last time in these three easy points:

    1)      A marriage is sacred and we should worry about what’s going on in our own homes and stay out of other people’s homes unless we’ve been invited in.

    2)      Super athletes are great at one thing – the sport they play – and we should admire the talent and honor God for the gift, but point the moral finger at ourselves. We shouldn’t place expectations on other people. We should only place them on ourselves.

    3)       If there is a mistake a person can make to wipe out the many things they’ve done well, then we’ve condemned everyone…because everyone makes mistakes.

    Those that live in glass houses should not throw stones!