ClydeStyle

Tag: heroes

  • You have real meaning with me

    Every now and then we should recognize those in our lives who help make things work. I’m taking about friends, family and co-workers that seem to be living part of their lives for you. They make sure you’re ok. They think of the small things you need and handle them. They are ready to throw hands for you and they always have an encouraging word.

    When it comes to you these people always see the glass half full. They are your built-in cheering team. In the world we live in everybody needs a supporting entourage. The point of this blog is that the people who are that for you need to be celebrated — more than once. It would be hard to imagine not having these unsung heroes in your life. There are many who are not blessed to have the right support network and they fall under the weight and pressures of the world.

    I owe the majority of my success in life to people who thought enough of me to make sure my “T’s” were crossed and my “I’s” were dotted. I could bounce ideas off these folks, they did the majority of my research and they helped me to be who I was meant to be. For me it’s the little things as these do-gooders made sure I ate healthy, had plenty of sleep, had plenty of relaxation and although I solved all the problems, I never did it alone.

    It’s important for people not to feel taken advantage of or feel that their work is in vain. These people aren’t looking for credit or any fame … they just believe in you. How do you let them know that they have real meaning in your life? If you take these people for granted you will find yourself by yourself!

    The great guru Bruce Lee said that words are energy and are like casting spells (this is why it’s called spelling) and you will become who you say you are. All positive people with have lots of positivity in their lives. The converse is also true. So express yourself in the most humble way you know how and let those in your corner know that you see their work and acknowledge their efforts!

  • Living With regret

    I must admit that I don’t normally watch the Oscars, but I am a fan of the industry and I absolutely love Chris Rock and Will Smith. I would like to believe that these two guys would be friends of mine if they were not famous and lived near me. We are in the same age bracket and have a lot of similar qualities.

    Now with that said, I was going to be disappointed in both men for their actions. I was also going to be embarrassed by the actions of both as an African-American male because of the stereo-types that will follow as a result of what happened. And then I wanted to write a blog and explain all the things that they did wrong. Then it dawned on me that context is everything and I was putting these two men in a category they do not belong.

    What I mean by context is that we are witnessing the results of previous interactions we don’t understand or have no full knowledge of. It’s disappointing that the interaction we saw was violent but there is much more to this situation that we may never know about. In addition, if this were just two average men (any race) and one had slapped another it would not have made the news and we wouldn’t be discussing it. Their fame made this newsworthy.

    We place people in categories, sometimes sub consciously, but in our minds we decide whether a person is good, bad, ugly, charismatic, funny or talented among other things. We develop beliefs about these people based on the categories and then expectations are set. Then we become disappointed when our heroes (in this case) do not match the consistency of our expectations. This is what is happening with all the commentary posted on social media.

    What should happen is we realize the truth about what we saw: the fact that these two humans were placed in a human scenario and both had an opportunity to do good, but failed. I truly believe if they had a do-over they could make a better decision. But above everything they proved that they are human and that they are flawed. If they were placed in the “flawed human” category from the beginning, then this interaction would not dominate the news cycle.

    Shout out to Tyler Perry, Denzel Washington and others who tried to bring healing to the situation. Believe it or not, sometimes things are allowed to happened for the purposes of seeing what others would do. God uses this tactic more often than you think. So I wondered how many people thought to pray when the incident happened? I wonder how many others were willing to do what they could to bring healing to this situation? Both Smith and Rock will have many private interactions following this incident. I wonder how many of those conversations would be with people who are trying to honor God in the moment?

    It’s sad when your own actions cause you to live with regret. Every time Will looks at his Oscar, the memory of the slap will come into focus. Every Oscar ceremony from this point on will remember the slap. How many business deals will not happen for these two because of this incident? Have they made peace with their God? Michelle Obama rightfully said that when they go low we go high. Going high requires us to process things in the highest part of our brains — and that’s our spiritual side. I pray the learning curve happens for all who are involved.

  • Which Memorials Do You Remember?

    Okay, so this is the week we honor those who died in service to our nation.

    This tradition was started after the Civil War. Legend says that an organized women’s group began decorating graves towards the end of the Civil War.

    Memorial Day (in 1860 it was first called Decoration Day) was officially proclaimed on May 5, 1868 by General John Logan, national commander of the Grand Army of the Republic, in his General Order No. 11, and was first observed on 30 May 1868, when flowers were placed on the graves of Union and Confederate soldiers at Arlington National Cemetery.

    Years later (1966), President Lyndon B. Johnson declared the birthplace of Memorial Day to be Waterloo, NY.  It was after WWI that Memorial Day changed from honoring just Civil War soldiers to anyone who died in any war.

    But I wonder about those who died in service to our country? Whether they died in war or were victims of what I call “American Circumstances.”

    American circumstances are situations that are unique to Americans and serve as a catalyst for positive change. Any event that led to the death of someone that eventually moved our country forward in a positive way would fit this category.

    Have we forgotten these fallen heroes?

    I’m thinking of the assassination of Martin Luther King Jr., which is different from the assassination of John F., and Robert Kennedy.

    The difference?

    King’s murder single handedly heightened the awareness of the struggle and pricked the consciousness of our nation. It brought Blacks and Whites together and changed our civil liberties to include all people. The death of the Kennedys simply made our nation lose trust in its government.  Conspiracy theorists had a field day with the inconsistent information distributed through the media by our government.

    Also consider the shooting deaths of the people at Kent State and the shooting deaths at the Columbine school. Although both were extremely tragic, Kent State’s shooting raised the social consciousness of our nation and set us for the defense of the freedoms we love. Death to protesters was something that wasn’t supposed to happen in our country. These deaths were not in vain. The Columbine deaths sent America into serious panic mode. New rules were resurrected and penalties were put in place in a very weak attempt to deter this violence. Of course it didn’t work. Several other shootings followed and all for the same reason – bullying. Whether on a college campus or on a military base, American suffered at the hands of these shooters our society created.

    Finally, let’s compare other plane crashes from the events of September 11. We tend to learn from every plane crash in history. Past plane crashes have contributed to many safety advances from the development of better engines to each plane having its own radar. September 11th gave us new rules, regulations and fear. We now jump through hoops to get on a plane and still to this day, terrorists are getting on planes with items other than Christmas presents.

    The point here is this: It’s important for us to remember those often forgotten heroes whose deaths moved us forward. These deaths – whether accidental or purposed – contributed just as much in the development of our country as any war did. If wars gave America physical stamina, then these above-mentioned deaths gave us mental toughness. We wouldn’t be where we are as a country without them. So please remember all who have served and/or died for the betterment of all our lives.