Most people, in reading the headline of this blog post would say that God made marriage sacred. Much of what we know about marriage is really heresy and misinterpreted biblical text. Much of our marriage information was learned from movies and TV shows and so it’s really difficult to separate fact from fiction.
The other problem we face in our understanding is which viewpoint we choose to believe. You see, it’s not enough to just do a Google search or go ask your local pastor. We must consider too whether the information is coming from a conservative, moderate or liberal point-of-view as the three do not agree.
So how can you tell which one is right? Is it even possible to have an absolute truth to the marriage question? Most of our beliefs will be shaped around the generation we are from. That doesn’t make the stance right or wrong, just familiar. So is your familiarity more correct than mine?
From my generation, marriage is honorable among all and it is between a male and female just as it is written in the bible. My generation was not accepting of same-sex marriage and really felt “funny” about interracial marriage. We believed that multiple marriages at the same time has it’s highlights, but would be a bad thing overall. And my generation frowned upon divorce but it was growing in popularity.
The generation before me believe marriage was between a man and a woman and divorce was flat out wrong. They believed there were men’s roles and women’s role and as long as each person “stayed in their lane” the marriage would be considered successful.
The generation after me believes that marriage is none of your business and whatever a person decides to do and who they decide to do it with is their business. If two men want to be married then that is their business. If you are in love with a sheep and want that animal to be your wife, help yourself but above all, they believe, people should mind their business.
As for the biblical interpretation, you would think that because the Bible describes marriage as a covenant that it should be sacred. However, covenants are broken all the time (Israel was enslaved due to their covenant breaking with God) and marriage didn’t become sacred until the Catholic church deemed it that in the 12th century.
Furthermore, the vows that you said at your marriage and definitely the ones in the movies and on TV are not biblical. The whole love, honor and obey line was written by a Baptist pastor. Divorce was allowed when the covenant was violated — meaning you broke your promise so the contract is dissolved. Divorce is a sin but not an unforgivable one. The sin of divorce is managed the same way lying, murder, covetousness and stealing are managed: You repent.
The key to understanding and having a successful marriage is about choice. You make a choice to stay with someone and work things out. And it is your choice! It’s your life and you decide your barriers and boundaries and be at peace. If you are with someone who is please to dwell with you then cherish them. The God that loves you would not want you in a toxic situation waiting on him to intervene. He never said he would. He already gave you choice!