ClydeStyle

Category: God

  • What if there were no mistakes?

    What if there were no mistakes?

    When I review my life, I see many colors. Colors which represent the good and the bad. All the good things about my life are the very bright colors – things like the success stories I have, fears I have conquered or the birth of my three children. And then there are the dark colors – things that I regret doing, saying, and falling for. The dark colors represent the times when I was a sucker. They are blemishes that prove I’m not perfect.

    I had a thought while I did this review: What if everything that has happened to me was not an accident or a mistake? What if the things that happened to me were my destiny and that a higher power had purposed and set some things in motion to bring me to a certain point? What if the words “accident” and “mistake” were all part of a big conspiracy to make us believe that we had a level of control we don’t really have?

    I heard an atheist say once that God, the creator of the universe, was no more than an imaginary friend who we created because we were scared of death and the unknown. He said that everything that has happened was going to happen anyway and because of fear, we invented religion. Religion then gives us something to do when we’re scared.

    I believe that there is some truth to what my atheist friend has said.

    The truth is that I believe, we have been allowed to believe, that there are accidents and mistakes so as to point blame when something happens. This is not to be confused with things that we cause to happen that were not accidents. For example, another friend of mine lost his job. He started off telling me that his racist boss finally got rid of him. I asked what happened and he said that they made him take a random drug test and the marijuana he smoked last weekend was still in his system. Trying to keep from laughing I said, “So how does this make your boss racist?”

    You can probably figure out the rest of the conversation. My friend lost his job because he was careless with it. Smoking illegal substances is a quick way to get fired from most jobs – especially in our economy. Not that it is impossible for his boss to be a racist – it’s still a challenge we face in the 21st century. But even with this scenario, there was a deeper reason – other than stupidity – for him losing his job. When we lose things, there is a lesson in that. For my friend, the lesson was responsibility. More than anything else, he needs to be more responsible. He needs to take responsibility for his actions and stop blaming others. Blaming others is a diversion from learning the personal lessons.

    What I want you to see is the beauty of trials and tribulations. I want you to understand the other side of a mistake. The point is that if we take away the concept of a mistake, then we would be clear to see the true destiny in the trial and we could “count it all joy.”

    Remember the old record players that required a needle to play the vinyl records? If you are old enough to remember them, you will also remember that sometimes the needle would skip. A CD player will sometimes skip too. And in both cases we would know that either the player or the record or CD needs cleaning. Could I say that the CD or record player made a mistake? Think about it before you answer. Was there a mistake made or is the “skip” just a by-product of usage?

    We don’t call it a mistake because we accept that things won’t work properly sometimes and we move on. Why can we not do this with our own mistakes?

    I remember years ago when I left one research company to work for another one. The one I was going to was paying me 15K more to leave. I felt unappreciated at the current place, so I left. I worked for this new company for 19 months. I signed off on the construction of the building, I purchased all of the furniture and hired all 44 employees and set this research company up to run like a well-oiled machine. Once that was done, they let me go and hired another person with very little management experience. I have to say, looking back on the experience, that when they let me go it was one of the best things that happened to me. At the time, I thought I made a mistake leaving the other company. I shudder to think that I could still be at that other company, complacent, underpaid and miserable.

    It would have been great if I could have taken the word “mistake” out of my vocabulary and automatically thought about the scripture in Romans 8:28.

  • I love because I know God

    There is a goodness that is overwhelming about the love of God.

    In a previous post, I wrote about the modern miracle of love and said that the basis of love was our knowledge of God.

    I want to shed a little light on that topic now because I believe there are many who use love as a cover up because their actions say something totally different.

    It is impossible to say that you really love, when you hate. You cannot follow Christ, but hate Muslims. You cannot say you have the love of Jesus in your heart and hold a grudge. And you cannot claim that you are a child of God and deliberately cause hurt to another human being.

    God’s love is not limited to whether you are Black or White; Republican or Democrat; Christian or something entirely different. We are not the originators of love, God is. That means HE gets to define the concept and those who have experienced it, imitate it.

    Did you catch what I said?

    We love, because we’ve been loved. Not because we believe the object of the love deserves our love. We love, not because we expect something in return. We love because we know what it feels like and we are now constantly responding to God’s love toward us. We understand why we were the recipients of his love and we pay it forward.

    I have a love for humanity because God does!

    I love my enemies because God loves his enemies and he loved me when I was his enemy!

    I love those who are less fortunate because I see and understand how God loves and takes care of them!

    The only reason people don’t love is because they have taken for granted the love God has already shown to them.

    The Apostle Paul explains it this way, “While we were yet sinners, Christ died for the ungodly.”

    It wasn’t the nails that held Jesus on that cross, it was love!

    So how are you going to love?

  • Problems with the church?

    So, having problems at church, huh?

    I mean, we know that Christ gave us all a mission which is to go into all the world and preach the gospel. But I’m talking about a church where everyone not only knows the direction they are going, but took a role in planning it and have been praying for it since the conception of the plan.

    I bring this up because I have talked with many who feel that their congregation is going nowhere. They feel that “status quo” has been the plan for years and as a result the church is dying. This is a touchy subject because for some reason we believe that we’re not supposed to question the authority of the church for to do so is to question the almighty God. Yeah right!

    The church is only going to be as good as its commitment to follow Christ. No one would argue that Christ is the head, but we can’t just measure success by the mere fact that people still show up on Sundays. And I’m not saying that we are all supposed to have a Megachurch. What I am saying is that Christ did not leave his church without direction. There are some clear things that we should be doing so that the world will see Christ in us.

    It can’t just be that we say we are Christians, we have to prove it. The only way the bible talks about proving our discipleship is with love toward one another (John 13:34,35). In an age where church splits are more common than mergers; where letters of dis-fellowship circulate more than letters of encouragement; and where preachers are being fired at an alarming rate, it’s no wonder that the church is dying.

    It’s like in hospice, we serve families who tell us not to mention hospice around dad cause he doesn’t know he’s dying. And then dad tells us not to mention dying in front of his family because they don’t know he’s dying. Everyone knows, but no one wants to address the issues.

    In addition, fear makes it hard for us to respond the way we should. We have been conditioned not to go against the system or leadership even when we KNOW that the leadership or direction is wrong.

    Now before you run off and kick in the church doors, understand that you need to be a source of help. It is possible that the folks in charge don’t know what to do. It’s probably the case that they need encouragement and to know that they will not be harshly judged if they make a mistake. It is equally true that they may be arrogant and need to step down from their roles. Whatever the case, the church needs to be moving in the direction to bring about GOD’s result and not man’s.

    I suggest the following as a means to endeavor to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace:

    1) Get involved! Don’t be the type of person who comes every now and again criticizing. You want things to change? Let that change start with you.

    2) Go to your leadership and tell them how you feel about the things that are going on and let them know that they can count on you to help make things better. Let them know of the high level of commitment you are ready to give.

    3) Always speak in fact, not fiction. When things are not going well, Satan has a way of spreading gossip and getting false information out to the general public. Make sure what you are saying is a provable truth. DO NOT bring gossip and hearsay to the leadership.

    4) It is never a good idea to have a meeting before the meeting. There should never be any secret meetings unless you are planning a surprise birthday party. People tend to get upset and defensive when they know that secret meetings are going on. Bring everything out at once. All things should be done open and honest before everyone.

    5) Make sure that you have scriptural backing for everything you say and do. You need to know and explain truth that is aligned with God’s word. DO NOT go to the leadership with “I feel”, “I think” and “I believe” statements. You must stand on God’s word. Personality problems are not God problems. If there is something truly wrong, then it’s wrong because you have scripture that says it is. Prove all things and hold fast to that which is good!

  • Maturity in Christ

    I often hear Christians and non-Christians painting a picture of Christianity in a very primitive state based on their understanding. What I mean is that they are still looking at scriptures and saying what they see instead of what they understand. The problem: When you take what you see in scripture and never look beyond it, all you get is a form of godliness. When you study and gain an understanding you get the form and function.

    So for instance John 13:23-24, “34 A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you, that ye also love one another. 35 By this shall all men know that ye are my disciples, if ye have love one to another.  This is a very “easy” verse to understand, but what you walk away with will depend on your level of maturity. Some people see the fact that there is a “commandment” in the first verse. This same person that sees the commandment will tell you that Christ commands us to do things. They will then begin to process their relationship with God based on a slave/master relationship.

    Maturity doesn’t even see the word commandment. Maturity emphasizes the function of this verse and only sees the love. The mature person does not feel “forced” to love. They don’t think that there is a negative consequence waiting on them if they don’t love. The mature person, based on their understanding, has a heart so soft toward God that the willingness to “do” comes from an inner desire to please God and not a fearful expectation of being punished by God.

    Spiritual maturity compels us to forgive, not because someone asked us to, but because God has forgiven us. We love, not because the object of our love makes it easy, it’s because God first loved us. We help one another, comfort one another and pray for one another, not because of a command, but because of what we understand.

    Hebrews 5:12-14 says, “12 For when for the time ye ought to be teachers, ye have need that one teach you again which be the first principles of the oracles of God; and are become such as have need of milk, and not of strong meat. 13 For every one that useth milk is unskilful in the word of righteousness: for he is a babe. 14 But strong meat belongeth to them that are of full age, even those who by reason of use have their senses exercised to discern both good and evil.”

    There is a serious need for Christians to move on to maturity and stop debating the gospel and start sharing it; to stop scaring people to be obedient and start encouraging people to be.

  • The someone who is worse

    There is so much pain in this world.

    From spiritual pain to physical pain, we struggle to deal with reality. We all utilize some coping mechanism for others to judge. We can’t seem to understand that we hurt.

    You have heard people say, “no matter what you are facing, someone is going through something worse.” Well, I wonder who is on the tail end of that statement? Who is the final worse? Is it the man in  Iraq who lost his family during the bombings? We called it collateral damage. I wonder what he called it. Or is it the person whose siblings are all strung out on crack cocaine? Or maybe it’s the mother in Africa who watched seven of her 10 children die of starvation? Maybe it’s the 11-year-old boy who repeatedly got raped by his uncle. Could it be the teenager who gave herself an abortion on the bathroom floor? The gay guy who was beaten to death? The recent Black man who suffered lethal injection in Georgia for a crime that seven of his nine accusers recanted their testimony and no physical evidence connected him to?

    I know it’s difficult to read these things. All of these are actual events that appeared in a newspaper within the last 6 years. Unfortunately, there were many more. I keep wondering who would be on the tail end of that quote. Who could be doing so bad as to trump every other bad happening in the world?

    It’s gotta be the person who denies Christ.

  • Our response to the resurrection

    Speaking of the resurrection, Jesus said, “I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believes in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live: And whosoever lives and believes in me shall never die.” And then he said, “Do you believe this?”

    This is the time of the year where there is somewhat of a unified effort among most Christians to talk about, remember, celebrate and observe Jesus’ death, burial and resurrection. It’s like the other time in the year where everyone wants to remember the “reason for the season” and celebrate peace on earth.

    I don’t have a problem with these times as much as I have a problem with how we interpret the meanings. Our beliefs should be the center of what we shape our way of life from. If we believe something then our lives should be consistent in that which we believe.

    For example, if things like compassion, integrity and excellence are things that I truly believe in, then the people that interact with me should experience these characteristics in me. I should not look down on anyone if I have compassion. I should not make it a habit to lie and cheat if I’m a man of integrity and my employer should not have to speak with me regarding my commitment if I seek excellence.

    I’m afraid that too many people celebrate Jesus as a seasonal holiday and have not made the commitment to him for life.

    Jesus ends the 26th verse of the 11th chapter in the Gospel according to John by asking the question concerning belief. He simply uses these four words that deserve a response. “Do you believe this?” If he were saying this today it would sound more like “If you believe this, then why …?”

    If we truly have been crucified with Christ and now as a result we are living by faith, our works should show what we believe. Faith without works is still dead.

  • The resurrection and the life

    Easter Sunday is a day that we enjoy hearing about the resurrection. We enjoy the story of Jesus’ resurrection as well as others whom he saved from death. This power is always an attention grabber because it goes far beyond our human abilities.

    Jesus made this statement to Martha in the Gospel of St. John: “I am the resurrection, and the life: he that believeth in me, though he were dead, yet shall he live”. I know, at face value the statement doesn’t make sense. Give Martha a break because we know the rest of the story, but she lived it. She saw her brother wake up from the “death sleep” and walk among them as if nothing happened. We don’t read where Lazarus laments about being dead or that the experience was even horrible. He just takes his place among the living. I’m sure he was thankful for what happened. The question I have is that if you die once like Lazarus and you get a second chance, are you afraid of the death the second time?Image

    I mean the fear of death has to not bother you as much. For those who survived Hurricane Katrina a few years back, would they be as worried about the next big hurricane? If you have been shot before should the sound of gunfire bother you as much? If you were about to walk away from a deadly car crash, should you be afraid to drive a car or ride in a car again?

    I want to attempt to crack open this scripture for everyone to have a better taste of its fruit. If Jesus is the resurrection and the life (and he is), then this ability would work on everything, not just death. This understanding was given to us under the death category, but I contend that this verse is more like the master key — it fits every lock!

    So, If I lose my job, I am dead to the job that I lost and I can surrender this dead to the resurrection and the life (A.K.A Jesus Christ) and he will raise up (resurrect) a new job for me that I may dwell (live) in. If I lose my marriage, home, money, self respect, or mind, the Jesus who resurrects will replace the old with something new for me. You see, it was difficult for Mary, Martha and the others to fully understand the power of the resurrection. We struggle with it today as well.

    Let’s not limit the resurrection and life to just a wonderful biblical story. Let’s not limit God’s power to only the measure we understand. Let’s surrender everything in our lives that is dead and allow him to breathe life into it again because he truly is the resurrection and the life. 

  • Birthdays are bigger than we think

    I think we all know people who, when asked about their birthday, say that they don’t celebrate it anymore or that it’s just not a big deal.

    What are we really saying about ourselves when we make these statements?

    One of the things I love about spring is that in addition to the season in the Midwest beginning to change, I have two lovely daughters who celebrate birthdays in March and in April.

    My girls are special to me. They know that they are special, but on their birthdays, I have an extra opportunity to celebrate the fact that they exist.

    This is a fact of life that is often overlooked in childrearing.

    The stability, security and self-esteem for any daughter are wrapped up in her daddy. A father is the first man that a daughter should be in love with. The number one reason is because this would be the daughter’s first taste of TRUE love – unconditional, never-ending, God-like love.

    Codependent women, for the most part, did not experience a strong interpersonal relationship with their fathers.

    I have counseled a variety of women who have said that even when their father was there, he really wasn’t there. He lived at the house, they ate dinner together sometimes and he was a great provider of physical things.

    But how often they exchanged intimacy was in question.

    There were no tender moments. They would say things like. “I know my Dad loved me, he just doesn’t express himself that way.” Or, “Dad loves me, he’s just very busy.”

    The effects are devastating.

    The daughter that doesn’t have the strong interpersonal relationship with her dad will always struggle with her relationships with men. The codependent part comes in her defining moments. She will always wonder is she beautiful, does she matter, who loves her.

    And she will look for a male to supply her with these answers.

    Just imagine the teenage boys willing to tell these girls that they are beautiful, they are important and they are loved.

    What do you think these codependent girls will do in return for these simply words that should have come from her dad?

    If you have ever wondered how some guys ended up with these very beautiful and intelligent women – you guessed it, codependency.

    The point here is this: Every little girl needs to know that she is loved and that she matters. In fact all of us do. These two things are directly attached to her inner conscious which she will then use to fight off the voice that tell her no one loves her or she’s ugly.

    This is why birthdays are especially important to all of us. They should be used as a tool to express love and to celebrate the life of a person we love. Everyone should have at least one day a year where people make a fuss, go out of their way and express their love all because of the birth of that special someone.

    It is also for this reason that my two little girls will always know that they matter, that I love them more than life itself and that they are smart and talented enough to do whatever they put their little minds to. They need to understand that our spirits are forever connected and death can’t even separate us. That our love is everlasting – which means from the day they were conceived, it was in love and that their life and death will be spent in love.

    Make sure the people you love know it. This must be demonstrated and said out loud often enough to make it a habit. This is how we live with no regret.

  • Christian restoration

    There is a need for those in Christ to renew their strength. This should be a daily renewal for those who believe. Well what about those of us who have sinned? How shall we be restored when we fall a guilty distance from God?

    There are three things that need to happen for restoration. It is essential that restoration happens, but we have to do our part.

    Nehemiah is probably one of the best stories in the bible on this topic. We see Nehemiah once finding out that the wall in Jerusalem needed to be rebuilt, he did three things that needed to happen to restore the wall. First, he cared enough to do something.

    His life was going well. He could have turned a deaf ear to the plight of Jerusalem, but instead he wept. He showed great compassion for those who were suffering. The next thing he did was pray. He talked to God and he came clean about the condition of Israel saying “Lord we have sinned.” It is essential in restoration to come clean with God. Often times we try (as crazy as this sounds) to not give God the truth. Not because we think he needs to hear it, but because we hate to admit it. It’s a very humbling experience to come face-to-face with our guilt. God expects us to though. He wants his children to be this vulnerable with him.

    Next Nehemiah began to work. He put his compassion into action despite the opposition he faced. This is because in the fourth chapter of his book, Nehemiah declares that the “people had a mind to work.” Nehemiah was able to get that wall built because he cared, prayed and worked. So we need to care enough to change, be honest enough to take our burdens to the Lord and leave them there and then go to work. We have to put action with our caring.

    These actions will lead to the restoration of any child of God would needs to be restored.

    Praise God for making a way for us!

  • Are you a true friend?

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    It is very difficult these days to find true friends.

    I’m not talking about just a drinking buddy or someone who you can tell your problems to. I’m not talking about the people who support you or will lie for you or who loan you money.

    I’m talking about a person who makes you better. The friend I’m talking about keeps you honest, is strong where you are weak and would defend you with his life. You can have a really bad argument with a true friend and get up and go to dinner afterwards. 

    With a true friend you can look at each other and just know. You just know that unconditional love is there, support is there and compassion.  This friend has no problem speaking the truth in love to you and you know if you want their support, you’d better come correct!

    This type of friend may wear other hats in your life. They could be your dad or mom, your minister or a spouse.

    In Proverbs 27:17 the bible says that as iron sharpens iron, one person sharpens another.
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    The constant scraping of knives together will sharpen each one for the better. Never can you have the scraping without benefit.

    A true friend is made of iron and they will be there no matter what. We serve a God that sticks closer to us than a brother! A true friend whom you can cast your cares upon because he cares.

    Do you have a friend like this? Are you this type of friend?