ClydeStyle

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  • What does the Resurrection mean to you?

    This is one of two times of the year where people are willing to engage in conversation about religion (Christmas time is the other one). There is much history and liturgy surrounding this time of the year and millions are comfortable practicing their faith. But outside of these two times of the year, what effect does the resurrection really have on those who believe?

    In America we have created in recent years cancel culture. This is the time where we use social media to shut people down when we don’t agree with them or we don’t like what they say or an action they did. In the this culture no one gets a second chance. In this culture, the majority get to play God and judge the actions of others as if they have no sin.

    It just seems that if we believe and practice the celebration of the resurrection because it actually means that our God has made a way for us through belief in his son which also means we get another chance. God extends his grace to us and we extend cancel culture to others — something is really wrong with that.

    So this brings the question of what does the resurrection really mean to us? In response to the resurrection shouldn’t we be will to offer the best version of ourselves for Godly things? Shouldn’t we want to give the best of our gifts for God’s cause? Because of the resurrection and the power that comes with it, shouldn’t we be changing the world for the better? Maybe that last question is not fair because for centuries we have controlled our use of God. Meaning that our constitution was written with a biblical backdrop. But if that’s true, how could slavery ever exist? If we really understood God’s economy then we would have created opportunity for all and would have made sure no families were left in poverty.

    I could go on but the point is clear: God has to mean more to the believer than two quick acknowledgements throughout the year and begin living in the resurrection– that means your personal life will add meaning to it. We know what the authors of the Bible wrote about it and we know how the Holy Spirit feels about it. Now what does your life show that you believe?

  • Spring and baseball

    When you live in the Midwest the weather doesn’t always cooperate like you want it to. I mean don’t get me wrong I love the change in the seasons and I really enjoy all the gorgeous colors of fall. There is even a time when I great enjoy the snow! There is nothing like sitting at home on a super cold winter day with no particular place to go. You have a house full of food and the choice to stay in and watch the snow fall (which is quite peaceful) or go out and play in it.

    The issue is that the snow comes during a particular time of the season and every time it seems to wear out its welcome. Winter lasts too long in Michigan! And it seems to get even longer every year. There is one thing that seems to help rush winter away and that is the start of baseball season! I’m really rooting for baseball. Last year was a great year and a strong finish. The world series last year was outstanding and definitely got me excited about this year.

    It seems as though America’s pastime needs a marketing makeover. The players still have great talent but the excitement of the game is not like it was. I can recall growing up as a child we would go to the games, listen to Ernie Harwell, keep score, have a ballpark frank or two and looked forward to purchasing merchandise. I love that old English “D” that always represented Detroit and the smell of the ballpark! The boys of summer always get started with spring and the weather seems to cooperate with baseball. Openings days are hit or miss but it’s not long before the weather aligns with the game and order is restored!

    Spring signifies a new beginning and the start of something new. It’s a time of renewal, reflection and planning. It’s a time where we can make full proof of our resolutions (if we have not given up on them). Let’s welcome spring with new ideas, new looks, new decisions and a positive outlook for this year! Play ball!!!

  • Can your friends pass the rain test?

    Rochester, New York carries the distinction of consistently having the most rainy days in America. At 167 days on average, the good folks who live there have to keep an umbrella handy. And if we can us rain as a metaphor for trouble then to live a life with almost half of the days of the year being full of trouble wouldn’t make for a good life.

    With that much trouble you can’t help but blame yourself for your troubles. There are people sitting in prison right now angry over decisions that went wrong. Some trouble is expected in life but not that much. On the contrary, what would it take to have a life almost void of trouble? The sun shines in Arizona 85 percent of the time. You would think it would be called the sunshine state. So the sun and the rain symbolize the good and the bad and my point here is to analyze what separates the two.

    We know that decisions play a huge role but I believe the one holding your umbrella shares in the copability. I guess because of the way I feel about connectiveness and relationships it seems that if I’m holding your umbrella that I’m going to make sure you don’t get wet. Now every one doesn’t have the ability or desire to take responsibility for another person’s actions. I just believe that if we are truly partners then whatever is in me to do for you, I will do it. This is actually a biblical principle as the bible says that God shall supply all our needs according to his riches in glory (Phil. 4:19). Said another way it means that God will be using all of his resources to ensure we thrive. Is it possible to be that friendly with someone?

    The point is this: Our arsenal of friends should include soldiers who are dedicated to your success and well being. Likewise, you should be the flipside of that for your team. Make sure the folks in your circle really belong.

  • Living With regret

    I must admit that I don’t normally watch the Oscars, but I am a fan of the industry and I absolutely love Chris Rock and Will Smith. I would like to believe that these two guys would be friends of mine if they were not famous and lived near me. We are in the same age bracket and have a lot of similar qualities.

    Now with that said, I was going to be disappointed in both men for their actions. I was also going to be embarrassed by the actions of both as an African-American male because of the stereo-types that will follow as a result of what happened. And then I wanted to write a blog and explain all the things that they did wrong. Then it dawned on me that context is everything and I was putting these two men in a category they do not belong.

    What I mean by context is that we are witnessing the results of previous interactions we don’t understand or have no full knowledge of. It’s disappointing that the interaction we saw was violent but there is much more to this situation that we may never know about. In addition, if this were just two average men (any race) and one had slapped another it would not have made the news and we wouldn’t be discussing it. Their fame made this newsworthy.

    We place people in categories, sometimes sub consciously, but in our minds we decide whether a person is good, bad, ugly, charismatic, funny or talented among other things. We develop beliefs about these people based on the categories and then expectations are set. Then we become disappointed when our heroes (in this case) do not match the consistency of our expectations. This is what is happening with all the commentary posted on social media.

    What should happen is we realize the truth about what we saw: the fact that these two humans were placed in a human scenario and both had an opportunity to do good, but failed. I truly believe if they had a do-over they could make a better decision. But above everything they proved that they are human and that they are flawed. If they were placed in the “flawed human” category from the beginning, then this interaction would not dominate the news cycle.

    Shout out to Tyler Perry, Denzel Washington and others who tried to bring healing to the situation. Believe it or not, sometimes things are allowed to happened for the purposes of seeing what others would do. God uses this tactic more often than you think. So I wondered how many people thought to pray when the incident happened? I wonder how many others were willing to do what they could to bring healing to this situation? Both Smith and Rock will have many private interactions following this incident. I wonder how many of those conversations would be with people who are trying to honor God in the moment?

    It’s sad when your own actions cause you to live with regret. Every time Will looks at his Oscar, the memory of the slap will come into focus. Every Oscar ceremony from this point on will remember the slap. How many business deals will not happen for these two because of this incident? Have they made peace with their God? Michelle Obama rightfully said that when they go low we go high. Going high requires us to process things in the highest part of our brains — and that’s our spiritual side. I pray the learning curve happens for all who are involved.

  • Being a friend

    There seems to be a shortage of true friends in this world. Social media can be down right evil sometimes. It gives everyone a reality show and truth be told, every thing that goes on in your life is not meant for prime time! You see, social media just wants the “show”. And they will use your life, identity, click bait and other avenues just to keep people watching so money can be made off the advertisements.

    This is where the true friend should come in. Your close friend is supposed to be a person who has proven that you can trust them, lean on them, be vulnerable with them and just be your entire self — good or bad– with them. The friend is the one who stops you from making stupid decisions that could lead to your demise. Your friend is supposed to be the eyes in the back of your head, the hell raiser when times get really bad and your defender when needed. Based on what we can see daily on just one social medium is enough to say we are failing at being true friends.

    When I see an embarrassing moment on social media I immediately think to myself, “Oh, if they just had a real friend.” I see women and men make completely idiots of themselves and become the entertainment for the world because they struggled to deal with some relationship issue. Someone treated them wrong, or made them look like a fool or both. These hurt people then go before the social media gods seeking approval, sympathy and support for their troubles. But all they become is a sideshow of comedy for people who could care less about the truth or the real story of what happened in your life.

    A friend is supposed to stop you from looking like an idiot. Social media is NOT your friend. So the next time you see some foolishness online that makes you shake your head or laugh out loud, think about the absence of that friend who could have prevented all the foolishness. If you are one of those people who believe telling all your business on social media is acceptable, please understand NOBODY CARES. I know you think you are telling it to a group of folks who carry the label of your “friends” but it really is just in name only. Even if you have the maximum of 5000 friends on your list, the lion’s share of them still don’t care.

    Don’t believe me? Go on Facebook and ask everyone on your friends list to send you $1 and see if the amount you receive matches your total number of friends. I promise you it won’t come close!

  • I’m baaaack!

    Yes. The headline is true. I have started writing again. I’m older, wiser and I have lived. I’m been through comedy and tragedy and I’m now back to share the experiences. Some of the experience will be spiritual and others will feel like therapy but it’s all being done to build you up and give thought-provoking commentary.

    There are more books in the works as well as a podcast. I am even working on an R&B band and a cooking channel. I am praying that these things will be a blessing to all.

    So for my first blog back I just want to share a bit about judging others. It seems that we are extremely hypocritical about this category because everyone has an opinion, but that only seems to apply when YOU are giving the commentary. It doesn’t feel so good when it flows the other way. The problem with judging is that it allows us to elevate our own sense of self-worth over another. What gives you the right to judge? It’s because I feel I have something very important to say … because I am that important. It seems that instead of the bias commentary, we ought to be engaged in helping.

    The bible says it this way: “If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.”
    Galatians 6:3 NLT
    https://bible.com/bible/116/gal.6.3.NLT

    The point here is that since we have the energy to burn, why not use it to build someone up instead of tearing them down.

  • Can’t we all just get along?

    It seems that in our country we have a problem getting along. The powers that be have forced us to choose a side and buy into the thought that you are either for or against. Who said that we have to choose a side? Who says that we have to be against anyone or anything?

    We are adults created by God to make up our own minds on things. This is truly the benefit of clarity. To know that you have choice and can decide your own who, what, when, where and why is the benefit of being in your right mind. Why would you let someone take that away from you.

    So, getting along is pretty easy when you consider a few things first. Before I am to get along with anyone else, I have to get along with self first. Why would I try to introduce a new interpersonal relationship to myself when my intrapersonal relationship is in turmoil. You see we live in a place where hurt people are hurting people and when you do not like the person you are, it is easy to focus that hate on someone else. But the truth is before you hate someone, you have to dislike yourself first. Hate has to dwell in you and then you cast it on to another. What do you think it’s doing inside of you?

    So you must first love yourself before you can ever begin to have a mutual relationship. You must first respect yourself before you can respect others. This seems so elementary but it is the truth.

    So if my intrapersonal relationship is right I am then ready to pursue a new relationship with others. I meet someone and before we say a word to each other I already respect them — because I respect myself. We then find common ground. During that search for common ground I choose to be non judgmental, I choose to be accepting and I choose to be honest. The greatest thing I choose to be is kind. When I do these things, common ground will be easy to find and we can begin a relationship allowing each party to live their truth. Now the level of involvement will be set by the energy shared in the dyad.

    As simple as it sounds, kindness doesn’t cost you a thing. Neither does deciding who to love, forgive, accept or befriend. Hate, strife, jealousy and the like always come at a price. How much are you really willing to pay?

  • Why all the talk about socialism?

    Our country has always had a major divide and it is camouflaged by hate rhetoric.

    When most of white Americans hear the word racism, it sets off an alarm that rings two fold in their minds. It is the embarrassment of our country’s past. I’m speaking of not just slavery but how things were done after that. I’m not even talking about reconstruction at this point or the fact that there were Jim Crow laws that our government allowed. America was truly not for everybody. But for this discussion I am just talking about how wealth was figured and distributed and who actual had access to what.

    So we know and have no argument that Capitalism encourages innovation and individual goals. This is a good thing. It is from this that the American dream was born.

    So in 1790 the industrial age hit the US and a guy named Sam Slater borrowed from technology abroad to advance the cotton industry here. Now of course the US (particularly the South) was known for its cotton as more than 90 percent of the world’s usage of it was purchased from the US.

    At this time America had free labor so it was all profit coming back. Innovation with opportunity is the first mistake of the misuse of Capitalism. This set a precedent for how we would negotiate Capitalism. Innovation was key but we wanted to limit the power to only a few.

    Even after the civil war, opportunity had still not reached the majority. As time went on, the second industrial movement happened. While the First Industrial Revolution caused the growth of industries, such as coal, iron, railroads and textiles, the Second Industrial Revolution showcased the expansion of electricity, petroleum and steel. Sounds good doesn’t it? Except for the fact that it still was not available to everyone and wages were far from fair.

    It wasn’t until 1969 that the third industrial revolution happened and that was the discovery of Nuclear power.

    When you look at all the right families in our country — JP Morgan, Kennedys, Rockefeller, Getty to name a few — you will see that they were about to take advantage of new industries that were not available to everyone. Money has always been power and wealth had been hijacked from most of America long ago.

    So even when opportunity for better jobs came around the pay still was not fair. Then the government tried to throw a bone to lower income Americans. You see the rich told us to chase the dream. Work hard, get a house and car and get married and start a family. Everyone wanted to own a home and live well.

    In 1930 the Federal Housing Administration began giving loans to Americans so that they could buy homes. No one of color got loans. In fact, banks were controlling who got loans and who did not.

    Even in the military where minorities were promised money for housing and schooling, which are still the number one and two ways to combat poverty, this was not made available to minorities.

    Of course you remember or have heard how districts were redlined to keep certain neighborhoods from becoming too ethnic. My point here is that Capitalism has only ever worked for the 1 percent and that is an exclusive club that 99 percent of America has not been invited.

    So not being able to change that system, the rhetoric today is Socialism which promotes equality and fairness among society. It attempts to make up for the injustices without taking away anyone’s ill-gotten gain.

    Socialism is about giving everyone the same opportunity. Now, if you don’t make the most of it, your failure will not be because opportunity wasn’t available.

    It means fair wages, better jobs, open opportunity and access to government subsidies and tax breaks to get families out of debt. It means great healthcare for everybody and it means eliminating the need for welfare.

    Basically, socialists are trying to reform capitalism so that it works for everyone.

    We shall see!

  • Who’s journey is it anyway?

    A journey is a voyage or the act of traveling or working. The word is used as both the noun and the verb so this word is quite descriptive.

    So discovering your journey or living out your journey is to move us from one place to another. We can go from being clumsy to graceful. We can go from ignorant to enlightened or we can just go from Albany to Buffalo — either way we are moving with a purpose.

    Now comes the New Year and we reflect of the past journey as a gage for how the new journey in the new year will proceed. We make plans, research, and plot a course for success. We make no room for life to happen on our journey. So we are easily derailed by death or the loss of something. Health challenges and relationship changes effect our journey in a mighty way.

    The ultimate question is how do we know if we’re doing what we were meant to do? I mean if life can so easily beset us, does that mean that I’m doing what I’m supposed to be doing unless tragedy strikes and then I’m excused?

    I believe the key is forward motion. In life we need to be constantly moving forward. The pace may change due to life’s challenges but forward is the constant, not a variable. Then the meaning of life is simple: How many hits can you take and keep moving forward? We are in pursuit of our destiny and when you make it from one year to the next it’s a blessing.

    You made the cut and you get to advance another year. Make the most of the year. It goes by so fast and when we realize the speed we’re traveling, summer is almost over. Strive to be the best version of yourself as you tackle life. You want to grab all that you can as you move forward. The gratitude and celebration is in the moving or how you negotiate the journey. Be strong and enjoy the ride!

  • Don’t say it; because you are better than that!

    In the book of James in the bible he talks in chapter 3 about taming the tongue.

    James compares the tongue to the govenor that controls a ship and the bit that bridles the horse. Both when used properly are for the purposes of controlling the whole.

    He also says the tongue is fire and if not controlled it would burn and destroy. The instrument used to control has been misused for retaliation. The biggest problem with retaliation is that it always hits the people that are closest to us.

    How many arguments have you had with people you have professed to love that ended badly because somebody made an out of bounds comment that was clearly meant to hurt the person?

    Sadly, the closest people to us are the ones that we know the most about. They have been vulnerable with us. They trust us with some very intimate things. We then turn around in our selfishness and unload hate at the ones we love.

    Selfishness is the reason we respond that way. Selfishness is the actual thing that needs controlling and God gave us the tongue to do that. All of our good, bad and ugly gets distributed throughout our whole bodies and before it leaves our temple it rests on our tongue. It’s at this moment that we are crucified with Christ (Gal. 2:20).